To be fair…

I'll admit that I'm unconventional. I sometimes see potential where none exists. So this post is about wondering if I jumped the gun or was full of bull.

I’ll admit that I’m unconventional. I sometimes see potential where none exists. So this post is about wondering if I jumped the gun or was full of bull.

In my last post, I pointed out some wonk-a-donk unusual items I read in both my local newspaper and a magazine I mysteriously get.

One of my great blogger buddies, Vanessa, pointed out, and rightly so (in both my and her opinion), that I should explore what was behind the seemingly wingdingydonger of a made up word (can you believe people do that?) and the wha-ha-ha? of a headline. Maybe I was missing something and I over reacted. (I know. Hard to fathom.)

If I can't take a closer look with these babies, I don't know else I can do.

If I can’t take a closer look at my own work with these babies, I don’t know else I can do. I’m going to use these when I edit my new novel.

Let’s start with “supposal.” I suppose it’s as good a place to start as any.

Much to my surprise, I was wrong if I gave you the impression that someone in my local newspaper made up this word.

Supposal is a real word and it has been around since the 13th or 14th century, which (as we all know) was a very hunky dory time for the English language. They made up some humdingers of words back then. It’s just that most of them died along with the people using them who contracted plagues and had the poor sense to be witches during the Crusades. (If my Western history references are a little off, pardon me. I’m a blogger, not a freaking historian.)

Anyway. A supposal is an assumption or hypothesis or a concept that is not yet verified but that if true would explain certain facts or phenomena.

I don’t think that in the case of a negotiation between the hospital and the nurses’ union that Management was making a hypothesis regarding the nurses contract, but maybe they were trying to float a theory about how likely the nurses would be to throw a bed pan at them if they didn’t cave to all of the nurses’ demands. It’s hard to tell from the article because it was vaguely written using words from the 14th century and I’ve thrown away the paper.

ðu scán æfenis þys, eh? No? It says, You can read this, eh?

ðu scán æfenis þys, eh?
No? It says, You can read this, eh? As I said, English was just the cat’s pajama’s back then when supposal was a word…

Moving on.

O Magazine had an article about how changing hair styles would change your life. I thought that this claim was either overstating the power of hair (except when stuck in one’s drain) or understating the quality of one’s life (except when dealing with a clogged sink).

There is just no way all that hair is coming out of that sink without changing someone's life.

There is just no way all that hair is coming out of that sink without changing someone’s life.

So I found the article online and took a look. Maybe there was something more to the better hair/better life claim than an attempt to appeal to women’s vanity and superficiality.

Again, much to my surprise, I was wrong. Sort of. There was more to the article than just the super power of hair.

This make-over cost me a pretty penny, Mister. But I feel like I could win Best in Show!

This make-over cost me a pretty penny, Mister. But I feel like I could win Best in Show!

To really zazz up your life and become the woman you knew you could be, you have to do more than change your ratty hairstyle. You have to glam up your face with movie-magic make-up and buy yourself a wardrobe that will set you back a few thousand dollars. But, hey, this is your life we’re talking about.

To prove all this making over is worth it, the magazine showed “before pictures” taken by a Polaroid camera circa 1970 after a particularly bad bout of insomnia or the flu and “after pictures” in a professional photographer’s studio with some sexy guy off camera telling them to “work it, Baby.” The change was impressive.

See what I mean? Poor Insomnia Barbie. But after she gets a makeover, Ken won't be able to keep his plastic parts to himself.

See what I mean? Poor Insomnia Barbie. But after she gets a makeover, Ken won’t be able to keep his plastic parts to himself.

These women commented on how much better they felt and looked. Their confidence level soared. They could do anything…except replicate that look after sleeping and worrying about their credit card bill. Thanks Oprah. But there are plenty of articles in the magazine about how to be your authenti-self (as long as we’re pretending, I thought I could make up another word) and accept yourself for who you are.

I have a supposal for you: The level of a woman’s confusion and anxiety increases (as measured by calories consumed) in direct proportion to the number of articles read in any typical women’s s magazine.

Drop 10 pounds fast? How about dropping that cake in the trash?

Drop 10 pounds fast? How about dropping that cake in the trash?

Hey, it’s no accident that I have a lot of research publications. I know how to formulate a hypothesis. I just didn’t know that all those years I was also making supposals left and right.

~ by Lorna's Voice on July 1, 2013.

30 Responses to “To be fair…”

  1. DO recover well and in your own time, Izzy. Love and hugs.

  2. Ahhhh … the English language. I cringe when I hear some of the newisms created – like conversate …. YUP … have heard it said by youngins’ often recently.
    Ahhh … the mind needs more confusion.
    Thanks for a laugh on my recovery days.
    Hugs mi amiga …
    Izzy xoxo

  3. This isn’t going to endify, is it? Shizzle, what have I startigated?

  4. I’ve always thoughtified so.

  5. Thank you so much. I try to have fun and bring others along with me. 🙂

  6. Interesting post, just wanted to say you’ve got a wonderful blog here.

  7. It takes an intellectualrific mind to blenderspeak with such finessery. Peg, we’re freaking awe-inspurting!

  8. And I bet she’s not telling that secret any time soon! 😉

  9. You are my hero! 🙂

  10. I have a supposal for you. I expect to make it through July. If I keep telling myself this, it will happen because I do plan on getting a haircut and maybe even a few hours of sleep. And I’ve not read a women’s magazine in 35 years. Imagine that. 😉

  11. Folk take anything Oprah say as the gospel. It’s not about the hair, it’s called being shallow but Oprah hasn’t told them that yet.

  12. I love lexiconcrapulating! I could do this kind of wordimication all day.

  13. I really did think you had a valid point, Vanessa. I should have explored further before riffing on these things. As it turns out, I learned something and got a good post from it. Thanks! As for new words, where do you think they come from? people create them! Preferentiate is a great word. Maybe we’ll see it soon in a dictionary. I think all we have to do is to start using it a lot! 🙂

  14. Good for you! Share them with us, PLEASE! 🙂

  15. Happy to be of assistestment. I’m such an accommodatory person when it comes to proper use of our language. 😉

  16. Thanks for the complimendation, Al. It means a lot coming from such an intellinformed guy like you!

  17. Yes, I was. Sometimes I miss it…sometimes. 😉

  18. I hear you. But that’s unintentional. The people quoted in the newspaper were using this word as an “informal” proposal–something the nurses could ponder but not take seriously, perhaps? I don’t know! I do know that sometimes the typos I make are very funny and I sometimes wish I could leave them in. Also the spell checker sometimes “guesses” wrong–those results are often hilarious, too! 🙂

  19. Someone really should test this supposal. 😉

  20. Makes more sense now…in an odd kind of way! 😉

  21. I certainly never had heard of it before, so I learned something new, too. 🙂

  22. Well you learn something everyday. I’m not sure I’ve ever used ‘supposal’ but it’s an interesting word

  23. oops .. that’s “withOUT supposal ..”

  24. “The level of a woman’s confusion and anxiety increases (as measured by calories consumed) in direct proportion to the number of articles read in any typical women’s s magazine “… Makes you wonder how we ever got along with “supposal” for the last 800 years, don’t it?

  25. When I type a comment or article or for that matter posting on my blog… I create new words every day… Thank the computer geniuses for spell check… otherwise a new dictionary would be needed to interpret my typing…

  26. Before I saw what you wrote later in the article, I said to myself, “Self, it’s easy to see this gal is deep into research.” How fun!

  27. A crediferous post indeed…. and that’s factulatory.

  28. Thanks for clearing this up for me. One mustn’t be assumptatory about unknown words I supposal.

  29. very learned, educational, am now compiling my own dictionary of strange words.. heehee! [smiling]

  30. Ha, I’ve been named and shamed! 😉 You were right then to assume that the article about hair was perfectly shallow, as it clearly was. I made up a word the other day too, accidentally, I don’t mean ‘accidentally’ was the word because obviously I didn’t make that up, I mean I made it up unintentionally, anyway, the word was – preferentiate, well I thought I made it up, but it turns out others are using it already. I think I need some sleep or something…

Silence can be just what the doctor ordered. You know I'm a doctor, right?

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