Is it on? I'm not feeling it. Are you sure it's on?

Is it on? I’m not feeling it. Are you sure it’s on?

I’m not sure what I expected, but I expected something.

Maybe it was:

  • the hours of formating and re-formating that turned my already dizzy blonde head inside-out
  • the virus that has set up shop in any body part I used to use for breathing purposes
  • the fact that I can see an image on a screen but not hold anything in my hands, so like George Clooney, it’s just not the same
I can see him, but I can't touch him, so, really, what's the point?

I can see him, but I can’t touch him, so, really, what’s the point?

But, People, the fact remains that I am now officially a published author.

This girl was destined for something...I just don't know what. Let's hope it's lots of book sales. It's sure not modeling.

This girl was destined for something…I just don’t know what. Let’s hope it’s lots of book sales. It’s sure not modeling.

My memoir, How Was I Supposed to Know? The Adventures of a Girl Whose Name Means Lost is available for purchase at both Amazon. com and Smashwords. I’m working on the paperback version next. My mom won’t read it unless it’s in paperback. Maybe you have moms like that, too.

If you want to learn more about the book, I’ve created a special page right here on my blog. Cleverly, I named the page, How Was I Supposed to Know, A Memoir?Β  Pretty smart, huh?

Here are some interesting facts about the book:

  • Depending on how you define “start writing,” I started writing this book 51, 11, 6.5, 2.5, or 1 year(s) ago.
  • It’s almost 115,000 words, which is a lot of words, even for me. The paperback will be nearly 400 pages long. But, let’s face it, I’ve had a lot of crazy adventures.
  • I couldn’t use my trademark zany pictures and captions like I do in my blog posts in this book, because I hear copyright violations like that would land me in the Big House, and I’m not talking the Governor’s Mansion. But the book has lots of my own photographs and is full of my trademark humor.
  • I decided to self-publish because I am too sensitive to withstand repeated rejection letters from insensitive agents and publishers.
  • I priced the book at $5.99. Lots of laughs, hours of entertainment, no calories, and less money than most lunches or movie ticket you could buy. Now that’s a deal!

So, people, I sure have appreciated your support of me and my blog and my writing so far. Please don’t stop now! If a quirky memoir from one of your favorite bloggers isn’t your kind thing in the reading department, maybe you know someone who would like to read a book about how to face life’s challenges with a positive attitude. And have a lot a laughs along the way. Tell them about my book.

Yeah, well, you don't want to overdo it. You know what I mean, right?

Yeah, well, you don’t want to overdo it. You know what I mean, right?

You know I’m both Face Book and Twitter Challenged. Maybe you could help spread the word for me. Give a sick dizzy blonde a hand. (I know, I need to take a course in marketing, but I’m exhausting. Give me a break. The “Pity Pitch” is all that is coming to mind right now.)

Yes, Sweetie, I know just how you feel.

Yes, Sweetie, I know just how you feel.

Any help you can give me by:

  • buying my book
  • reading my book
  • reviewing it
  • telling others about it

would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you so much!

Ooh. I just love you all so much!

Ooh. I just love you all so much!