“I couldn’t pick just one letter. You know, Baby, had to pick two. Now you got me so excited. I’m doing my rocker split for you. Oh, yeah. Baby. Baby. Sing it with me, Baby, Baby…”


My new most favorite letters of the alphabet are “V” and “N.” Why?

Maybe you’ll understand if I switch them around: “N” and “V” or “NV.” If you think I’m talking about moving to Nevada and trying out my new pole dancing routine on the Las Vegas Strip, you’re wrong; although the exercise would be great and I’m not loving the humidity that comes with summers up here in the Northeast.

I never thought my yoga classes would help me become so flexible. And the “plank” really helps with the upper arm strength needed to wrestle myself into these tight shoes and that slinky outfit.

No, sound out the letters, people: NV…envy. Are you starting to get the picture? If you’re thinking that I’ve had a spiritual meltdown, abandoned Buddhism, and now practice jealousy with a vengeance, you’re wrong again; although if I find out that some publisher just discovered a quirky blonde blogger who is writing a memoir (and it’s not about me) and is in negotiations for a multiple book and movie deal starring Michelle Pfeiffer and George Clooney, I’m going to jealous with a capital Jello.

This is the part in my book when Phil tells me he can’t live without me. Spoiler Alert: that happens a lot in my book.

Alright already. The reason “envy” is such a big deal in my life right now is that I won the Envy Round of Katy’s Seven Deadly Sins Contest with my story, Behind the Mask.

I want to thank:

  1. Katy for running the contest even though her health has been uncooperative–something I know a little something about. She also deserves recognition for making a generous donation to the charity of the winner’s choice (in honor of the winner). I really wanted her to make a donation to Bloggers Anonymous, but we all seem to want notoriety not anonymity, so the self-help program we so clearly need fizzled out like soggy fireworks. I chose a charity that works to protect animals.
  2. Katy’s compadre, Lenore, also made a generous contribution to one of three charities she likes to support (in honor of the winner). I chose One Simple Wish.
  3. All the judges who deemed my story worthy of making it to the finalists’ round. Every essay had something very special to offer. I was honored to be among such creative, effective writers.
  4. All the people who voted for me or the few people who voted for me over and over again. I vow not to ask for your votes again should my future “sinful essays” make it to the final round. I believe in sharing the love and, trust me, I feel a lot of love right now and want others to feel the same way!

Katy has already announced that the next sin is sloth, but I’m finding it hard to snap to it and rush to write my essay on that one. I wonder how many others are feeling the same way?

It’s not too late to join in on the fun. Just go to Katy’s blog and submit a 600 word (or less) essay about the sin-du-jour. You have until JUNE 28, midnight to submit your entry on s…l….o…t…h.

What? You’re writing a story about me? I’m flattered, but don’t expect me to rush down from this branch to read it. I spent the last two weeks getting from the base of this branch all the way down to this bend. I’ve got some serious snoozing to do before I start my way back over to the left. Or would that be the right. It’s hard to tell when you’re upside down.