I’m Afraid of Facebook

FaceBook scares the bejeezus out of me!

I’ll admit it. I’m afraid of Facebook.

Consider the facts:

  • I’m blogging, sort of.
  • I just texted someone.  I’m hoping it was my son.
  • I ended my teaching career with several highly popular online courses.

Isn’t all that testimony enough to my willingness to wade into the murky cyber-waters that didn’t even exist when my brain was young and best able to absorb all this change-in-a-nanosecond technology.

Heck, nanoseconds didn’t exist when I was in college.  So give a dizzy blonde a little credit for at least being here.

But you won’t find me on Facebook.

I’ve worked hard to simplify my life.

Facebook seems like one slick way to complicate things faster than you can “ping” or “poke” or do whatever you do to others whose faces might not be theirs and whose lives may be only as real as the ether through which they share it with you.

Shizzle sticks, I have a hard enough time figuring out if people standing right in front of me are genuine.

Plus, I don’t want to be poked; I like to be hugged.

Those occasional “friend” requests via email put me in a tail-spin. I’m immediately transported to my hyper-sensitive teenager days when friends defined me. If I don’t accept the “friend request,” will the person think I’m a snob? I’m not a snob! I have to send them a long email and explain that if I accept the request, I’ll have to get a Facebook account, which to me is tantamount to entering a maze…blindfolded.

I can just imagine the sleepless nights I’d be in for if I became one of the 500,000,000+ active users. Solitaire and teaching my dog tricks are too important for me to get caught up in being a Facebook addict. No, my insomnia would be caused by my angst if someone rejected my friend request. Why aren’t they responding? Are they mad at me? What can I do to make they like me? Should I send another request? OMG, have they blocked me? I just don’t need all that Facebook drama in my life. I have enough Face-person/dog drama to keep me awake if I choose to worry about any of it.

There are many advantages to being on Facebook. You can find people, even if they don’t want to be found. You can avoid email and telephones–only using your expensive droids as mini-computers and cameras (but I’m told they can act as telephones, too). While your public speaking skills may atrophy, your manual dexterity with any sized keyboard is legendary. You can collect “friends” and feel really good about the fact that you know more strangers than your siblings, partner, or co-workers.

I’m just kidding. Social networking used to mean going to a physical place and actually talking with people–inefficient and cumbersome by today’s standards. Now it means something every different. For 500,000,000+ people, it seems to work. For me, not so much.

But that’s alright. I’d understand if you were afraid of public speaking and avoided it…

~ by Lorna's Voice on May 26, 2011.

18 Responses to “I’m Afraid of Facebook”

  1. […] over people’s lives and attention spans. A long time ago (in blog years) I wrote a post about my feelings about Facebook. It was a well-researched piece for someone who knew nothing about Facebook. Since then, I created […]

  2. […] how I said a really long time ago (and many times since) that I’m afraid of Face Book? Well, yesterday, for the sole purpose of marketing my precious memoir, I created a Face Book […]

  3. Couldn’t agree with you more about the Facebook thing, but I don’t have direct experience–only imagined fears!

    Thanks so much for all your help. You’ve proven to be such a valuable resource in the blogging world.


  4. Lorna, WordPress is so glitchy at the moment that I’ve added your blog to my feedreader and have only just realised how new your blog is! If you need some more help with it at any time, let me know – and I’ve some stuff on my blog (do a search in it for ‘blogging’ or ‘wordpress’ and you’ll find it) about blogging here and hope to add more later.

    Facebook…. *sighs*. Hmmm. I had an account there and while it was great being able to be in touch with friends, eventually I deleted it as I couldn’t bear the way FB kept tampering with the privacy controls and basically the lack of privacy there anyway. I’m older than you (60) and know exactly what you mean. You’re actually ahead of me as you text and I don’t! (My mobile/cell phone died and I didn’t bother to revive or replace it). I think that despite the fact that many people our age and older use FB, it’s really more for younger people who have been born and grown up in a world that’s internet orientated and don’t know anything else. This is natural for them.

  5. Thanks for your comment, which didn’t seem ranty at all. I know so little about Facebook, and what I do know makes me want to avoid it. All I see are the complications, not the opportunities. You’re right about blogging not serving the same purpose in the social networking world. I’m much more interested in connecting my ideas and with others and getting my writing “out there” than I am in connecting with people–at least at this point in my life. But you never know, right? To each her/his own, I guess…

  6. Facebook has been a useful tool to rediscover old friends and schoolmates. It is also extremely useful as a family meeting point where we all can keep in sync with each other. Annual family and class reunions are darned near impossible for well over half the folks invited get to them. The popularity of Facebook gives everyone a chance to have reunions on line with a full turn out and much higher frequency. When we do get to meet in person, those meetings are so much more meaningful with the frequent connections made in the on line relationships. I love my blog but it serves a different purpose. Its meant for networking with ideas however it is not very good for keeping family and friends connected. I have two criticisms of Facebook. They need to lose or compartmentalize the games that clutter up the wall. Facebook needs to admit that it is a data mining business and stop resetting my privacy settings on every upgrade! That is just downright dishonest. Sorry for the rantyness of this comment.

  7. U r welcum 🙂
    and i was just kidding, u didn’t scare anyone 😉

    and if u can take out 5 minutes, pls have a look at my blog….actually i started blogging a day before…so it’ll be nice if you read it !

  8. You’re always welcome.. your blog seems to be really nice! 🙂

  9. Remember, I’m 53 years old and grew up when you had to get up to change the TV channel. I didn’t mean to scare anyone. I just wanted to explain why I am reluctant to join the Facebook revolution. Thanks for your comment and for taking the time to read my blog!

  10. wow! Though i’m not afraid of Facebook, but u make it seem quite dangerous thing that can happen to us !
    But I love the post 😉

  11. Well, I’m just about 15 and I’m a face book user, well at one point it helps me keep up with my relatives abroad, cause I meet them like once in a blue moon and me and my 3 friends started our blog like a few weeks ago and no doubt face book helped passing the news, and now I’m so happy that every one is usually talking about it, face book is even means of getting with your friends in vacations … and remembering all those moments in pictures, well I don’t mean to disapprove what you have shared but I’m just letting you know my feelings 🙂

  12. I hate facebook but still have an account. I was at one point collecting friends like pokemon and have just had a massive clear out of 150+ friends! and I felt so guilty about it…I think it would just be easier not to have a facebook! 🙂 stay clear of it I say! It eats up your time and before you know it the day is over and you are still in your pjs! x

  13. The complications are endless–and these are only the ones I hear about or imagine in this little head of mine. You raise a great point about low self-esteem issues should no one miss you…

    Remember when “face meant eyes, nose, mouth, etc.” and “book” meant paper and words? The old days may not have been good all the time and for all of us, but there was some comfort in their tangibility.

  14. Intersting observation. When did anonymity become such a draw and authenticity become taboo? It’s a social phenomenon that really fascinates. Thanks for reading my blog and commenting on this post.

  15. Facebook has ended the need to make ‘faces, to meet the people you meet’. Not that you don’t try. Lure of interaction over net is anonymity and a chance to ‘reinvent’. However as Bard almost said, the tragic flaw in this thought is tragic flaw itself.

  16. You hit this one on target, too. I am a failed Facebook user like Margie. A friend encouraged me to sign up. She said it would be fun. I don’t know who is having fun because I’m not.

    If I post something no one acknowledges it or they just “Like” it. What do they like about it ??? The fact that I wrote it or what the content is about.

    UGH …!!!! AND … all those birthday reminders.

    I would quit the whole site …. BUT ….. how would I feel if no one noticed …. OR …. if they “liked it”.

    Good Job …!!!


  17. Thanks for your comment and perspective. That’s exactly what I was hoping for!

  18. I’m a failed Facebook user. I joined because my grown children told me it was a good way to keep up with their lives. Turns out their lives are too busy to use Facebook much, so I am still in the dark, mostly. But now I know way too much about the trivialities of the lives of some of my other relatives and friends…
    So I announced that I was quitting Facebook, and that brought a response from 4 of the 50 odd friends I have on Facebook . Either few read what I write, or few care…
    But, Facebook is a good way to tell my friends about my blog, so periodically I post a link in Facebook to one of my blog posts…
    Would I join Facebook if I had a do-over? No. Will I quit? Probably not. How else would I get news that my husband’s cousin’s friend’s dog barfed on the carpet?

Silence can be just what the doctor ordered. You know I'm a doctor, right?

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